My Cries

No way in telling where I'm going.
Just have to get out of here.
This life I'm serving is only hurting.
The hardest part is just simply breathing.

I wish you heard my cries,
While I fill my mind with lies.
Telling myself you really care.
But then again you aren't here.

You could have saved my life.
If you heard those cries,
And still be by my side.
But instead I have to die.

If I must go then can I leave happy?
Let me waste away in your arms.
Your chance to say "goodbye",
And finally hear my cry while I die.

Our Song

We take a little walk,
Down good old memory lane.
While holding hands,
And feeling no pain.

So good it feels back home.
Living the life we used to know.
Sometimes we wish it was this good,
But life is never how it seems.

So we take a step back,
And we sing our song once again.
La la la la la la.
La la la la la la.

The same old song we would sing,
Brings back years of memories.
To this day we continue to sing,
To take us back to who we used to be.

So take my hand like before,
And we'll sing our song once more.
La la la la la la.
La la la la la la.

Love of My Life

Some things you say change my life.
Those simple words make me fly.
All I need is an "I love you",
To assure you are my man.

So think of me tonight,
When we can't sleep.
Too many thoughts on our minds.
Is this who I might actually love?

Sudden risks I want to take.
Just to know your name.
If only you knew,
You are the love of my life.

Time to Leave

When you try so hard just to shine.
When you waste it all to get in the light.
When you lose it only for him to see,
Just how he's killing your inner being.
That's when it's time to leave.

Sometimes you need to give up.
Sometimes you need to never love.
Sometimes he needs to understand,
Just how much you care for him.
That's when it's time to leave.

Looking for that star you wished upon.
Looking for hope to keep moving on.
Looking for that love we both knew.
Just that one love that seemed true.
Now it's time to leave.

Nothing Left

These tears don't even know,
Why they keep falling.
It's all become a blur,
Of the past, present, and future.

Everyone knows.
You're the only one for me.
I can't make it alone.
Don't leave me tonight.

I sit here alone waiting,
Hoping to forget my loneliness.
My heart is torn from you.
There's nothing left to do.

Shot Down

Why don't you just stab me instead?
The pain couldn't be any worse.
I pull together the last drop of hope,
Just to get shot down once again.

Can't you just open your eyes and see,
That I'm everything you want and more.
I'll tear down the stars for you.
Just please pick me.



I would end this poem nicely but I would rather just say...
Fuck you.

Giving Up

You're breaking back in.
Everytime I try to let you go,
You appear here back once more.
I know I can never quit.
You're my addiction.
But he doesn't know that,
Which makes you my dirty little secret.

Everynight I hide away.
Giving up my breath for you to stay.
Hoping that you will lie awake with me.
Hoping that you will make a way with me.
You see I have a problem.
If I'm not what you need,
I'll become what you need.

I know I should just say goodbye.
But no longer can I lie to myself.
There's no breath to my life without you.
So what is a girl like me to do?
I'll tell you just what.
It's a little thing call overdosing.
And soon enough I'll be fast asleep.

Alpacas

Alpacas’ fur so soft and fluffly.
Their tails are extra puffy.
Pet them carefully, they might bite.
Seeming nice, but they’re really not polite.
Giggling noises while prancing around.
It may seem girly but that’s their sound.
Feed them lots of food,
And there will be no feuds.
You may think it’s love at first sight.
But before you know you’ll be in a fight.
It’s hard to gain friendship,
When the alpacas’ teeth have a grip.
Why can’t we be friends?
Just start over and make amends.
With a creature as cute as you,
My love for you can only be true.

Unloved

Why don't you love me?
I tried so hard to be your everything.

This pain is eating me alive.
I'm no longer a person.
Just a worthless body,
While my mind is else where.

Love is the slowest way to die,
Because this hope will never leave.

Simple Love

I still love you all the same.
Even though I only feel pain.
Though you're the one who's heart is slain,
I'm the one mourning in vain.

Ever since our fears have grown,
It seems cruelty is all that's shown.
Now that you're off on your own,
I'm feeling more and more alone.

Sorry if I'm cold,
But our love is put on hold.
Love never dies old.
Just was never truely told.

So not only did we end,
It seems we can't be friends.
But I could no long pertend,
That this simple love would transcend.

Journey To Happiness

I was born to search for you.
The long trailed adventure,
For the key to all happiness.

Risking it all just to discover.
Even if I must feel the pain.
No more living on the safe side.

No longer can I spectate.
I can't bystand my own life.
Even if I get booed for trying.

It's time I stepped out to shine.
Putting my heart out for you.
Just so I can find happiness.

Move On With Your Life

You could move on with your life and be alright.
But you choose to stay with me instead.
Which breaks my heart because I'll have to break yours soon.
Just please realize the truth and let me be free from you.

My eyes are telling you lies hoping you'll see the truth.
But it seems like I'm going to have to unveil the rest.
Just needing the strength to leave all doubts pertaing to you.
It's time you moved on with your life but without me in there too.

Please find yourself so I don't have to hold up a hard, cold mirror.
Reality is no longer better than our fantasies.
So why don't you just go back to sleep and picture you with me.
Because when you wake up I'll no longer be here in your arms.

Deeper Inside

Do you even care?
Did you ever care?
I'm just another memeory fading.
Look deeper inside.
Only feelings of wrath.

You see this?
Or are you too busy in a mirror?
Your words cut me deeper than a razor.
These scars will last a lifetime.
Misery is overcoming any hope.

A dagger at my heart every time you appear.
Flashbacks of the night you left me here.
Time I face the facts I'm forced to follow.
You never loved me nor will you ever.
You're just another motive for my wrist slits.

Forever and Always

Pull me close to you.
Never let me go.
Just let me know,
You're here to stay,
So I can know my place.

I knew it all along,
That with you I belong.
Drilled into the back of my mind.
Shut you out because I'm not fine.
But here you are again, breaking back in.

You're all I've ever wanted.
Hoping I'm all you need.
I can be if only you wish.
Just say forever and always,
And I'll be there.

Dreaming of You

It's that time of night again.
We wishper "goodnight".
Yet there's more to be said.

I lie weightless in bed.
Thinking you're right next to me.
But no, it's only a dream.

But was it only a dream,
When you kissed me in the street,
And replied "I love you too."?

My dreams may not seem present,
But that's why you are here.
Turning my fantasies into reality.

Final Words to You

Lost all the fire in my eyes.
Had no more drive for life.
Only friend was my knives.
Not even seeing, barely breathing.
Then you appeared from the shadows of the skies.

Picked me up from my pain.
Opened me up,
And slayed the wicked from my brain.
All I needed was for someone to care.
Now finally happiness I can gain.

Speechless I am of you.
No words come to mind,
Because I am in awe of what you do.
But one last thing I must say,
Thank you and I love you.

Broken Hearts

I walk this path night and day.
Either way it's all the same.
Your final words continually seep into my mind.
You claimed that you loved me,
But yet you're no where in sight.

A perfect picture painted in our minds.
Till I slipped and tore mine apart.
Now all you have to say is goodbye.
It may seem better off this way,
But inside we both know that's a lie.

But who here is the one to blame?
You stole my heart right away.
Now I only return the favor,
But in a different way you might say.
Stealing then shredding is my game.

If only I knew what I did to you.
Then maybe you'd be in my arms today.
But now it's your favorite time, 11:11.
For once I'll take your advice and wish,
Wish that you would stay.

Billy Mays

Billy, Billy, Billy.
Your loud vioice brightens my day.
Many thought it was silly.
But to me it was brave.

My role model you were.
Envious of your confidence.
Until your death occured.
Infomertials shall never be the same.

The lives you've touched,
Are no longer change.
For cocaine is what you clutched.
Instead of mighty putty or oxy clean.

Defying Gravity

Swore I'd never fall again.
Broken hearts can't love.
But this isn't even falling.
I'm rising up to your love,
While overcoming the past.
Finally, I'm defying gravity.

Now that you're with me,
My heart can soar.
Way past the clouds.
Up to the stars I wished upon.
Now my wildest dream came true.
I flying free with you.

True Feelings

Your big brown eyes can't hide your lies.
I can see you through and through.
If only you knew what you meant to me.
Then, you'd no longer hide.

I know you think of me,
When she's in your arms.
I know you love me,
Even when we fight.

No one knows the pain I endure,
Watching your feelings in disguise.
But now finally at my breaking point,
There's not much more I can do.

If You Love Me

When everything goes wrong,
Hug me and tell me it will be okay.
When I've lost all hope,
Hold me close and help me pray.

When I say I want to be alone,
Never leave me because you know it's a lie.
When I finally realize the truth,
Let me know you'll never say goodbye.

When all my tears have dried up,
Forgive me and start anew.
When I say "I love you",
Kiss me and reply "I love you too."

Fall For You

There is nothing more I can do,
Besides live forever within you.
With a boy as sweet as can be.
If only you could fall for me.

This world has a lot to bestow,
But your love is all that shows.
Even though she broke your heart,
You're the one who ripped mine apart.

It's simple enough,
This love is not a bluff.
For a sweet boy who never knew,
All I can do is fall for you.

Happiness

Don't let me go.
I'm finally to that state.
Falling in and out.
We collapse.
But always find our way back.

We're here.
Not just you anymore.
Us together.
Pursuing our happiness.
You and I, I and you.

Struck

I'm desperate for your voice.
She'll tear you down,
During your time of need.
Just listen to me.
I'll help you through.

My x-ray vision saw it all.
From the beginning.
Her wicked cast.
Your finally hit.
But I'll help you through.

Your Last Day

If today was your last day,
Would you say you were sorry?
Would you call those lost friends?
Would you leave all the sadness behind?

Live every moment as the end.
Life is your creation.
It could be your best friend.
Or another enemy in your path.

If today was your last day,
Would you be happy with your choices?
Would you tell someone you loved them?
Could you leave that life behind?

Envelope

All my feelings.
Written down.
Put inside this envelope.
Sent to you.
So you can open me up.
And see what you mean to me.

This envelope.
Crumpled up.
Just like my heart.
It's all yours now.
So be careful what you do.
I break easily.

Yogurt Time

Hear that growling?
I think it's my tummy.
It's yogurt time,
That's extra yummy.

I grab my pink spoon,
And head for the table.
As soon as you know it,
My spoon is unstable.

A little monster stole from me.
Now I'm stuck eating,
Alone with my fingers.
Chowing barbarically and defeating.

Undead Love

Here again the same thing.
Tears tattooed on my face.
Hatred creeping up.
You ask me to hold on.
There is no more time for love.
Love is dead in me.

I just can't take this anymore.
Pushed way passed the limit.
The world is falling apart.
And I don't belong.
For some reason though,
I belong with you.

This ha.te just grows.
I will fight till you fall apart,
And finally give in.
My love may feel dead.
But truly its just waiting to escape.
Escape from this bottle I trapped it in.

Here With Me

I see you lying next to me.
In the store, there you are.
Constantly surrounded by you.

Consistently in my dreams.
Dancing with you.
Falling more in love.

Hallucinating your presence.
Lying to myself about you being here.
So that someday it will might come true.

Leaving

On and on these fights continue.
Some how we always make it through.
Back to the way we were,
Even though my heart is still blue.

Once again you're sorry.
Once again I believe you.
All I do is hurt inside.
This smile of mine is untrue.

Forever more I am yours.
Deep down I don't want to.
But never can I leave your side,
Because I can't breathe without you.

Done

I loved you.
You loved using me.
This love was abused.
It made me h.a.t.e. me.

You're sorry once again.
And once again, hurt.
These eyes have seen this,
Too many times.

Playing on repeat.
Falling everyday.
It's all the same.
Because of you.

The world I gave you.
It was never enough.
Take it or leave it.
I'm done with you.

Broken Heart

You can't love with a broken heart.
Torn in two from the last boy.
The halves must reunite before moving on.
Part still has feelings for him.
While the other half likes him.

All you're doing is causing pain to him.
He loves you so.
But you will never completely love him.
So put yourself back together.
Grab hold and move on.

Piece your heart back together.
Forget that boy who broke you.
And love him completely.
For my friend loves you.
And if you hurt him, I'll hurt you.

Let Me In

I pour out my soul to you.
In return, nothing.
I know what's bothering you.
Yet you don't open up.

This house you're locked in.
I'm the key.
And you're about to lose me,
If you don't unblock the door.

You're going to break out soon,
If this silence keeps up.
Find a way to let me in.
Then we can truly be friends.

Hope

I was crying alone at night.
Hurting like never before.
Now this pain no longer endures.

Hope is what the world needs.
It gives us all that second chance,
To start over and make anew.

Pain comes from letting your heart win.
But out of the storm always comes light.
Eventually the light will find us all.

Who To Choose

You caught me off guard.
Still recovering from him,
Some how I still have love for you.
I have feelings for two.

This space in my heart meant for one.
But how do I know,
Who will stay by my side?
Always there you were.

He is the keeper of my key.
And you are the mender of my heart.
So which to choose?
Or who will choose me?

Sad Ending

Today you walked out of my life.
Then nothing seemed right.
Everything about you,
Has become who I am.

All I do is mope around.
And hope someday you will be found.
My heart is missing it's pieces.
I need you to mend it back together.

I can no longer breathe without you.
For this love has finally become true.
This is the ending we didn't want to see.
But this world will never be what we wanted.

Goodbye

I need to hold you close.
But we're worlds apart.
Goodbyes are second chances.
This farewell is final.
Never again shall I see your face.

They say move on,
But where do I go?
My whole heart devoted to you.
I can never love again.

Just that last touch,
Made me feel like flying.
But you're not here tonight.

I'm trying to forget all about you.
But sometimes the pain persists.

The key to my heart forever belongs to you.

Creating Life

I tried to be what you wanted.
But it didn't come naturally.
Sorrow became my friend.
Life is my creation.
Choosing pain just to feel.

Seeing now how to live.
Guiding me to shine the light.
I now create joy.
Though naturally it doesn't come.
It's still here.

Powers

Me, a small girl.
Worthless.
You, everything.
My world.
What power you have.
Controlling how I feel.
Just with a nod of your head.

Talking the night away.
Unleashing your powers to charm me.
Overcoming my worthlessness.
Walking on air.
Because of your powers.
I'm free of my strife.
No long am I abandoned.

Your Choice

Those few extra seconds.
The world.
More meaning.
As envy creeps up.
Caring towards her more.
You show who's your choice.
Second best is all I'll know.

Finding Me

You think you know me.
Everything you think is wrong.
There's so much more to me.
If just opened your eyes and saw.

Who I am on the outside,
Can't even compare with my interior.
What you see isn't truly me.
There's so much more waiting to get out.

I'm afraid to let you see me.
For I don't want to disappoint you.
So me you shall never really see.
Unless you dig deep.

Fly Away

Fly away forever.
But is forever enough?
Who I am,
Can't exist here.
So to another place I must abode.

In a little creepy town,
Shall I dwell.
Where I can be my messed up self.
Dreaming up my creepy thoughts,
In my little creepy town.

That Little Boy

Among the hungry I rest,
Waiting for someday to be fed.
Poor little children roam the streets,
Hoping for a day to beat this strife.

No income earned since no jobs we have.
Happiness rarely appears.
Yet somewhere in the slums of the streets,
A little boy showed kindness to me.

Old and hungry I may be,
But that day was extra tough.
For I was extremely ill,
On my d.e.a.t.h. cardboard box.

That boy found me shriveled up.
No food or shelter,
Just me sick as can be.
The young child stayed with me.

His presence alone filled my soul.
The food he brought me satisfied my hunger.
Clean water from him clenched my thirst.
My illness soon departed.

Never again I saw that little boy.
Some say he died of starvation.
If that is so,
That little boy gave his life to save me.

Time For Change

I am ready to be loved.
No more sorrow.
No more misery.
It's finally time for change.
Opening up to you.
Pouring out my soul.

This realization is overdue.
I'm sorry for not opening my door,
For not allowing you access.
But that is in the past.
Another lesson I learned.
It's time you came in.

First Grade

Crayons and paper all we need.
Scribbles is all we know.
Barely reaching the table.
Here's my greeting from below.

Laughs and games.
Giggling all day.
Never knew a dilemma,
While we would play.

Friends were in plenty,
As happiness was in many.
Easily amused.
We'd even laugh at a penny.

Oh what fun we had,
As a young little pup.
Memories now forgotten,
Because we've moved up.

Broken Together

I know you think of me when you're with her.
Your expressions tell all.
Then why stay beside her?
Move on to who you really want.
Your heart deserves better than her.

You were the leader of the broken.
But who will now lead you?
Finally broken down to my level.
This pain we share.
Forever more shall it be ours.

Welcome to the world of suffering.
Where love no longer exists.
But some how deep down here,
Us broken together,
Find love for each other.

My Choice

This revaluation of mine,
Hurts more than your words.
Because of it,
I'll never hear those words again.
Even if they hurt,
I'll miss every one of them.

Bittersweet this choice of mine.
The best thing for me,
Is leaving you.
But also it's the hardest thing,
To be who I am.
You are who I am though.

What must I do to be happy?
Leaving would hurt so much.
But the pain you cause me would be gone.
This choice I need to make.
But I won't be selfish.
So I'll stick with you and be hurt.

Alive

I can feel you surrounding me.
Your love a constant presence.
Filling my empty soul.
Because of you,
I'm now alive.

Fighting back I may try.
But we both know I can't resist.
Over and over I fall for you.
Because I need to feel this way.
I'm now alive.

Searching for invincibility.
Showing me how to reach out.
Your strength is making me stronger.
Because I need to breathe.
I'm now alive.

Who I Am

Call me out,
So I remember who I am.
This body I dwell in,
Doesn't matter to you.
Only you can bring me back.
Guide me with your love.
Back to who I am.

Your World

You got everything you ever wanted.
Except me.
The world is yours,
But you gave it all up.
Just to have me.

Me, the worthless one.
But in your eyes,
Beauty was all you viewed.
The other part of your soul.
Which is why you chose me.

But by choosing me,
You still gained the whole world.
I'm am your world.
At least that's what you think.
Never again will I feel worthless.

Forever To Myself

It's finally coming clear,
That you've moved way on.
And don't want me here.
Your life no longer includes me.

Sorrow all I felt at first.
My life incomplete.
All emotions were about to burst.
Feeling much self pity.

Then it hit me.
I can live without you.
I'm not afraid to be alone.
This realization was overdue.

Alone is how I want it.
Forever to myself.
Just the way I like it.
My heart is happy with it's self.

Now I realize,
This is how it should be.
Me facing this world alone.
But do I completely agree?

Silence

Commotion is unlikely.
Silence is needed.
Can't focus.
In one place,
But still in another.
Need quiet.

Thinking.
How impossible,
With this noise.
My happy place.
Only achieved.
With silence.

The Day of No Tears

Troubles continue.
All hope is lost.
Close to suicide.
Cuts all down my wrist.
Yet no tears fall.

All pain is increased.
Welcomed to rock bottom.
It's over.
All alone.
Yet no tears fall.

Everyday.
Every night.
But why not today?
So many tears wasted,
But now they're needed.
Yet no tears fall.

Cried so much.
No love left.
So what next?
End it all.
Time to extinguish my misery.
Yet no tears fall.

Good Times

Never knew how good it felt,
To feel the feeling that makes you melt.
So wonderful and free.
If only it could always be.

It saddens me to know,
This moment isn't slow.
The end is near.
No longer this feeling is here.

Leave the good times behind.
More we shall find.
This memory will ever last,
Even though the times have passed.

Miracle of Love

Sounds heavenly.
Only good.
Never hurt.
But what is love without pain?
Nothing.

What you hear,
Is not the truth.
It takes a miracle,
For love to endure.

All hope lost.
There is no trust,
When struck by love.

Cut down to the veins.
Waiting for the day.

The day my miracle comes.

Strife

Now that you're gone,
Life is worse than ever.
Even though we can't endure,
Your memory preserves.

The misery you went through.
Death seemed like an improvement.
Even though you meant the world to us.
Your confused mind was made up.

Now for the rest of us,
We must piece our lives back together.
Grab hold.
Learn from this lesson of the past.

Mourning persists in your memory.
Your burdens landed on our shoulders,
Just as you left us.
This pain and misery is coming clear.

Your horrible life is now my strife.
As your memory brings back tears,
This pain of yours now belongs to me.
Should I die too so someone else can have it?

Avoiding selfishness is nearly impossible.
This strife may seem never ending.
Death may seem fresh,
But in the end it does more wrong.

Choices

Power in your hands.
Divulge that secret.
Keep it within.
Which voice to listen to?
The choice is yours.
But that one word,
Can change someone's world.
So what is it going to be?
Let yourself out.
Withhold it all in.

This Love and H.a.t.e.

Your smile that changes my world.
Your melted chocolate eyes.
Your perfectly chiseled nose.
I h.a.t.e. it all.

Optimistic you always are.
Friendly to everyone.
Sweeter than pie.
I h.a.t.e. it all.

The savior of the hopeless.
Love over flowing.
Curiosity peaking.
I h.a.t.e. it all.

This hatred is strong.
But my love for you,
Over takes it all.
This love and h.a.t.e.,
Is breaking me down.

Your love for me,
Builds me back up.
This love and h.a.t.e.,
Goes on perpetually.

What You Do

Oh if you only knew,
That my heart is blue,
All because of you.

Understanding is frustration.
This feeling wasn't my expectation.
You are my only vocation.

Anger is what you do to me.
Myself you will never see.
Because I am hiding from thee.

Searching hard must you do.
So my heart you can go into.
But never will I allow you through.

Someone Watching Over Me

Standing in the darkness.
Waiting for myself.
Lost I am.
Where did I go?
No body knows.
But no body cares.
So even though I'm hopeless,
I'm off to find myself.

Off on my journey.
A guidance right behind me.
Showing me the way.
Who would do such a thing?
There must still be love somewhere.
Sensing the presence.
Someone watching over me.
Someone still loves me.

Your Love

Surround me with your love.
So I can spread it around.
This world has become so corrupt.
Killing is alright to do,
If it's only a baby.

Waiting for people to wake up,
And see the truth of their injustices.
Use me to guide them to that truth.
Your love can save us all.
But people first need to open their eyes.

Love is all we need.
Yet it's scarce.
Sometimes the hardest thing,
And the best thing are the same.
Spread the love.

Time Machine

Waiting for my time machine.
So you could have seen.
The you used to be.
Who was best friends with me.

I've got to get out here.
Return to the pastimes.
Where laughs were plenty.
And friends were many.
No complications occurred.
But how do I return,
To the life I adored?

In my time machine,
We'll go back to that scene.
To where we loved each other.
For one another.

A few years back would be okay.
Long nights whispering secrets.
Wishing on stars.
Singing loudly.
Dancing wildly.
The way things supposed to go.
With sisterly love we shared.

So in my time machine,
When things were serene.
We'll find happiness again.
And soon be friends.

Sparkling Sister

Every time I fall,
You're there for me.
We go together,
Like trees and leaves.
Or ice cream and Sunday.
Different we may be.
But together we're one.

Doubts you may possess.
I would write the world,
To show how beautiful you are.
Your shining smile,
Turns my frown right around.
Laughs and love only from you,
My sparkling sister.

Blissful Brother

You're the only one,
I can ever believe in.
Fights fade,
As we grow closer.
Sharing laughs.
Lifting my burdens.
These walls we built up,
Will never be torn down.

Even though I feel,
That you deserve better.
Permanently you're here.
We're stuck together,
As if made with glue.
No stalking I must do,
For you're always there.
My blissful brother of mine.

My Savior

I'm staring at perfection.
An angel you are.
Hero of the hopeless.
No flaws in you exist.
I'd write the world for you.
Just so you can know,
That you're my savior.

Everything I Need

I try to live without you,
But I just feel .
Returning once again.
My heart will never leave you.
Hurt is all I feel.
But no matter what,
I still resort to you.

My mind is fixed on leaving.
But my heart isn't going anywhere.
Why must I love you?
Comparing everyone else to you.
You've given me a taste of vulnerability.
Now I can never have less.
Everything I ever needed with you.

I've had enough just alright.
It's time I finally got perfection.
That's only with you.
So no where is my heart going.
No matter how much I need to leave.
I can never love anyone else.
You're everything I need.

Fiction and Reality

Let's go way back into the past,
To when princesses and princes ruled the land.
My knight in shining armor saved me,
From the evil witch.
Struggles were scarce.
Fairy dust fixed everything.
And we lived happily ever after.

My fiction life I still dream of,
Where someone actually gave a damn.
Reality crushes like a bulldozer.
Knowing you'll never be my prince,
Just a jerk that breaks my heart.
Love is myth,
And life is a bitch.

Enjoy Life

These scars are just reminders,
Of my poor unfortunate past.
I moved on from that life.
But never will I completely.
That person is still in me.
Deep down she lives.
Maybe one day she will revive.
But until that day,
Enjoy life I must.

Someone New

Out of no where.
You were there.
Trouble getting over.
Help from a four leaf clover.

His words inspired me,
To finally open my eyes and see.
Someone new my heart beats for,
Whose writing I adore.

Over you I finally am,
Because I love a new man.
Deap down feelings for you still exsists,
But I can no longer persist.

With you I only felt pain.
With him is like new summers rain.
He will alawys love me,
While you would only flee.

So it's simple enough.
My decision is not tough.
I'll never be good enough for you,
So he is who I pursue.

This Madness

What do I get for this?
No feeling.
I'd rather feel pain than this.
I want to take that life back.
That life you told me not to live.

But I can't.
You said no,
But my heart needs the feeling.
It needs the pain.
Time to take back the life I led.

Slits all down my wrists.
Show the pain of my love for you.
It can only be returned,
If I stop this madness.
This life can't be mine always.

Cold Turkey

Psychological dependence.
Must have more,
To satisfy my soul.
Cravings persist.
No I must say.

Withdrawals.
Abandonment exhausting.
Almost there.
Just a little more pain,
Till it's out of my system.

Cold Turkey.
All or nothing.
Nothing all for you.
I'm at the end of this path,
Because of you.

On Top of the World

Up, up.
So high my spirits are.
On top of the world.
These dreams can be achieved,
With your support.

Life before was dull.
No hope was found.
Everything turned around.
A wake up call.
I just believed.

Risk.
Breaking out.
Finally found myself.
This is where I belong,
On top of the world.

Run Away

Let's run away forever.
Leave this all behind.
Start over.
Be new,
And just be us again.

This world is not what we expected.
It's time to take a stand.
Run away for good.
Then I can be happy,
If only you came too.

Envy

Deep seeded.
Right down to the roots.
Filled with envy.
Causing more disputes.

Ever growing,
Till you're mine.
Long lasting evil eye.
I'll never be fine.

She's Changing You

Life isn't the same,
Since you're with her.
It causes me pain,
To see that you've changed.

She can't love you like me.
Her wrath is becoming yours.
Why can't you just see?
That she's changed you.

It's like a slit,
Seeing you upset.
You handled it,
Just like she would.

Her way,
Is now your way.
It makes me gray,
To see you two as one.

Fill my Emptiness

I'm tired of being lonely.
This emptiness needs to be filled.
No happiness shall come,
Till no longer am I desolate.

I'm finally ready to be loved.
Strong enough to leave my doubts.
Unlocking the gate,
And letting you in.

So drown me in your love.
Stay here with me.
Or again I'll bleed.
With you I'm happy.

No Good

Always wrong.
Never right.
The one for you to blame.
No sleep I find tonight,
For this guilt is full of shame.

Ruining everything.
Causing no good.
Finer you deserve.
Choosing better you could,
Yet I'm the one you preserve.

My Life

Long lingering pain.
Crushed damaged heart,
Never mended again.
Misery is pleasant,
Compared to no feeling.
This life will always be mine.

Monsters

This uncontrollable feeling,
Makes me want to hurt you.
It breaks into my body.
Turns me inside out.
My opposite comes forth.
Then I fight for you.

If only I could put it back.
But nothing will stop it.
No shields.
No nothing will keep you tamed.
So try to bear this,
This monster I hate.

Close to D.e.a.t.h.

If you only knew,
That you would be the d.e.a.t.h. of me.
My love for you is k.i.l.l.i.n.g me.
All this pain and suffering.
Just watching you together,
Puts a knife right down my wrist.

Death seems so much easier.
And chances are I might.
This body that I dwell in,
Isn't worth this fight.
Alone, I'm wasting away.
And you're the one to blame.

Impact

I swear I never meant to hurt you.
Life was changing like lightning.
Our worlds broke apart.
You were a semi truck,
Crashing into my tiny car.
But was it for improvement?

These dents will never leave,
Like the scars your words caused me.
But the semi truck departures.
While the little car is abandoned.
Our roads may never cross again.
But please know that I still love you.

Let Out Your Feelings

If you love someone, tell them.
Everyone wants to know they're loved.

Don't be afraid to express yourself.
Show what you're made of.

Reach out and tell someone what they mean to you,
To lift yours and their spirits.

Don't wait till later.
The heart doesn't know the word later.

Let out your feelings now,
Or it might be too late.

About Me

Emery.
Loud, energetic, talkative, and understanding.
Sister of Sam, Charlie, Will, and Finn.
Lover of theatre, food, and Russia.
Feels cheerful about rain, shoes, and HGTV.
Needs family, friends, and faith.
Gives laughs, love, and life.
Afraid of fear, heights, and school meat.
Wants to see Barcelona, Rome, and Russia.
Resident of America for now.
Limeson.

Deliverary Day

We arrived at seven,
Ready for a long day.
Our hearts raced with fear,
Wishing and praying everything will be okay.
Hee-hee hoo.

We watched the monitors like a hawk,
Hoping nothing would go wrong.
If only we were emotionally prepared,
Then, we would be strong.
Hee-hee hoo.

The hard part finally came,
PUSH! PUSH!
Before we knew it,
We could see his tush.
Hee-hee hoo.

A beautiful gift from God,
Little bundle of joy.
Lifting our spirits,
That little baby boy.
Hee-hee hoo.

Mumzy

You make it easier,
When life gets hard.
Make our house run smoothly.
Cooking and cleaning.
Taking care of all.
With your super powers.

We would be at zero,
If it weren't for you.
No food.
No clothes.
No love.
Without you.

Thank you for all.
We take it all for granted.
Every little act of yours.
But know we love it all.
You are so much of our hearts,
We love you no matter what.

My Guardian

I'm finally allowing you in.
These doubts are vanishing.
Learning how to trust again,
Showing me the way.
Thank you.

You're everything I need.
Making me a better person.
Giving me my smile back.
Causing laughter.
Thank you.

My guardian.
Displaying how to live.
Bestowing reasons for life.
I have hope because of you.
Thank you.

Loneliness

Quiet scares me.
Will you ever return?
I can't stand being alone.
My heartbeat is getting louder.
I need company to fill this quietness.
So please return back to me if you love me.

This space is missing not only sound from you,
But also your love is absent from here.
Only you can lift this loneliness.
Fill my heart back up,
With love for you.
I miss you.

Back on Manhattan Circle

Childhood is calling.
Long summer nights out,
Catching lightning bugs.
Climbing trees.
Back on Manhattan Circle.

No problems ever occurred.
Playing all day.
Flying kites.
Making new games.
Back on Manhattan Circle.

The world was ours,
But we never left our backyard.
Few worries,
That popsicles fixed.
Back on Manhattan Circle.

New friends made.
Old friends kept.
Childhood s on.
We are all one.
Back on Manhattan Circle.

Take Me Back

I want it all back.
I need it all back.
You were always there for me.
And I made you want to leave.
I myself for losing you.
I'd take it all away any day.

Traveling back in my time machine.
I would go to when I crossed that line.
Pushing your limits.
I never meant to hurt you.
I never meant to change.
Just please take me back.

Closet Poet

In the moonlight,
I'm hidden away.
My powers come out.
The pencil dashes across.
Painting rhythms and rhymes.

As daybreak arrives,
All powers hide away.
Waiting for isolation,
To write again.
Words can't return yet.

Just as a superheros,
My powers must be hidden.
No praise.
Appreciated by only me.
And now you.

Holding Back

beginning of a poem:

Holding back.
All the words we never said,
Appear before us now.
Regrets quickly arrive,
As our corruptions absented.

Messed Up World

Your beauty shines outward.
Your soul darkens the room.

You lead.
You follow.

You're smart.
You're dumb.

You're genuine.
You're fake.

You aren't loved.
You are loved.

Addictions

Addictions.
Take over our lives.
Become us.
We become them.
Break them?
Love someone.
Love yourself.
Open up.
Write.
Become new.
Become you.

Over Again

Must I repeat it?
Over again,
I don't miss you.
Why must I feel this way?

Once you left,
My heart sunk back under.
Over again,
I fall for you.

Moving on isn't a reality.
My heart is stuck on you.
Even if my mind isn't.
Over again.

Magic Man

This pain still exists.
But how to make it disappear?
Show me how to rise above this.

Use your magic.
Help me be happy.
Vanish this tragic.

You're the Magic Man.
The only one who can transform me.
Finally happiness began.

Instead of pulling a bunny out,
You pulled out a smile.
Now bliss sprouts.

Now to thank you,
I'll give you my heart.
But you tell me to shoo.

There is someone else for me,
I'm the Magic Man.
I can have anyone my heart pleas.

But you're not the one.
My duty is over.
I made you happy so now I'm done.

Rebirthing

The past is much more than a memory.
It's a lesson that we learned.
But sometimes it's better,
If we just left all behind.
Or maybe even just started over.
Just be born again,
As a better person.

Rebirthing.
The process of starting over,
Becoming a new person,
Or changing.
The only way to leave the past.
And it's that time.
The time to rebirth.

Living Again

Life was so meaningless,
Till you walked in.
Just your smile alone,
Made me rethink.
It isn't life or .
It's living.

You changed my whole mind.
The way I thought.
We are one,
Living.
This world will never be,
Never be what I expected.

We're heading up.
And someday might go back down.
But we're trying our best to handle,
To handle this ride.
As one we can.
We are living again.

Ugly But Beautiful Toad

What an ugly toad he is.
But what beauty on the inside.
He could be the one always loved,
But the only toads won't go near him.
Just because of his exterior.

He sits all day on his m.u.s.h.room.
The one place where he is safe.
Mushrooms don't care what toads look like.
They just enjoy the company.
Like two peas in a pod.

The toad's heart shines out.
But the others are blinded,
From all his ugliness.
The toad will always hope,
That the others hearts will shine too.

That's What You Get

That's what you get,
For choosing her.
Sadness.
Madness.
Bitchiness.
But it's your own fault.
You could have chosen me.
But no.
You would never think of me as that,
As more than a friend.
So that's what you get.

Now you're finally opening your eyes.
The mistake you made.
But it's too late.
I'm gone now.
And she is all that's left.
That's what you get.
And that's what you deserve.

What is this Feeling?

What is this feeling?
As soon as you left,
I forgot who I am.
Why do I need you to survive?
I finally know this feeling.
It’s love.

Love.
The closet thing to magic.
Tt's a battle field.
One problem.
You're only in love with the idea of love.
I need to win your heart.
So let the fight begin.

Never Good Enough

You left me,
When I needed you most.
So betrayed I felt,
For I'm no longer the you want.
You reminded me that I'll never be good enough .
So our love slipped away.

For once I felt loved.
I felt wanted in this cold world.
But it was all a lie.
I was replaced as quickly as the wind blew.
She caught your eye just as I did,
But I wasn't good enough.

Love

Love.
The closet thing to magic.
It's a battle field.
One problem.
You're only in love with the idea of love.
I need to win your heart.
So let the fight begin.

I Never Knew

I never knew.
I never knew anything going threw your head.
Why did you think this?
Why did you become this way?
I never knew.

Who am I?
Why would you ask me that?
You’re Eddie Black.
But that was never good enough for you.
What else do you want?
I never knew.

Hate was a strong word.
But you d her.
She gave you life,
But that didn’t stop the .
Why would you your own mother?
I never knew.

Today I knew.
Today I didn’t know who I was.
Today I d my own mother.
What happened?
I'll never know.

Maybe

I need a friend.
I wish you could be that friend.
The friend I need.
You were her.
But we lost each other.
Then we lost ourselves.
I want to grow back.
If it is even possible.
Maybe if you tried harder.
Maybe if I tried harder.
Maybe it could work.
Just maybe.

I Am

I am in pain yet satisfied.
I wonder what is wrong with me.
I hear the madness growing.
I see the scar forming.
I want more.
I am in pain yet satisfied.

I pretend nothing happened.
I feel the pain growing.
I touch the wounded area.
I worry someone will find out.
I cry for I am ashamed.
I am in pain yet satisfied.

I understand what I am doing is wrong.
I say this has to end.
I dream I will do better.
I try to reach my goal.
I hope I can conquer this.
I am in pain yet satisfied.

I Love You

As I stare down at my blank paper,
I wonder why I’m having so much trouble.
I’ve written tons of poems,
Just not about you.
Why is this so difficult?
Because no words can describe this feeling,
Besides “I love you.”

What You Wanted

I tried so hard.
Just to be what you wanted.
All Because I needed you.
But it looks like I'll never be good enough.
I'm sorry for letting you down.
I'll never be what you wanted.
But what about what I want?
Does that matter?
I've been wasting my time,
Just for you.
Now it's finely my time,
Time for you to be what I want.
Except you're already all I want.

Regrets

These scars will stay forever.
A constant reminder,
Of who I am,
Or who I was.
But I can be that person again.
Just walk out of my life.
Then you'll see.
The more regrets I'll make.

Belonging

I finally found where I belong,
But it doesn't feel right.
Maybe I don't want to belong.
Always alone.
Always lost.
Always me.
Nothing can tie me down.
Not even the sense of belonging.
I have to move on,
And continue to be alone,
Continue to be lost,
Continue to be me.

Our Secret Life

Our secret life.
You have your world.,
And I have mine.
But here we become one.
Together forever,
Always united,
Through our secret life.

Book Shelf

If I were a book,
I would want you to be my shelf.
To protect me.
To hold me.
To always be with me.
But I'm me,
Which isn't good enough for you
to do any of those things for me.
So I'll just dream for the day to come.
The day I'll be that book,
And you'll be my shelf.

Vulnerable

Always returning to you.
Even after your hurt.
No one else can compare.
You're vulnerable.
And someday you'll be mine.

Together Always

As the warm autumn breeze bristles us through the air,
We try to stay close and not be separated.
It's not possible though.
At some point we must go our distance.
Now's the time.
The wind picks up and we're off.
We both knew this had to be.
But then, as if a miracle, you're back by my side.
The world is ours now,
Together always.

The Missing Variable

It's not complete,
But what's missing?
The variable.
Time to solve.
Then I'll know.
Oh, Now I get it.
N=you.
You were missing,
But know you're found.
Just don't get lost again.

Broken

Finally built up,
The walls come tumbling down.
Nothing could break us,
But you did.
Your words.
Your actions.
Your thoughts.
They broke me down,
And I'll never be back up again.

My Love

Happiness quickly fades.
Sadness soon arrives.
Flash backs all down my wrists.
These memories are still alive.

Only one place I find peace.
Those big brown pools of yours.
But you're also the reason,
For all of my sores.

Everything I meant to say,
Now comes out through my tears.
You're the only one I'll ever love.
Which is why I have so many fears.

Open Up

Knock. Knock.
Someone wants in.
But will you let them in?
You choose to be alone.
You choose not to trust.
But it's never too late.
Open up.
Let me in.

Alone

Alone.
That's all I'll ever be.
That's all I want to be.
Or that's all I tell myself.
My mind says one thing,
As my heart says another.
Which do I listen to?

Questions

Who caused this?
you.
What caused this?
emptiness.
Where is the scar?
heart.
When did this happen?
once you entered my life.
Why did this happen?
no one saw it coming.
How did this happen?
easily.

Heartbeat

You approach me.
Thud. Thud.
Your hands find mine.
Thud. Thud.
Your soft lips press against mine.
Thud. Thud.
I never knew I could feel so much.
Once pain was all I knew.
Now just that sound.
Thud. Thud.
It's getting much louder,
as we're getting much closer.
Thud. Thud.
I can't get enough.
So never leave.
Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud.

Pick Me

In a sea of people,
You chose that one time to nod,
to wave, to smile
just at me.
I crossed your mind.
Even if it was only for a second.
But now I need more than that.
Please pick me.

Green Monster

Back off!
You horrible monster!
I don't love him.
So I don't care if he is with her.
They can be happy together.
But then why does it hurt so much?

You with her.
Who cares?
It means nothing.
Just a simple crush.
Nothing more.
But then why does it hurt so much?

Lyrics: Moving On

I put myself too deep into the situation.
It just gave me more pain.
I'm moving on
I'm finally over you.

Lyrics: Torn

My tears are streaming down just like a storm in April.
Your jokes can't even cheer me up.
My heart is torn in two.
None of my wishes for you are coming true.

Lyrics: Your love is me

If you knew I did this all for you
Then maybe you'll see my love for you is me.
The pain, the suffering won't go away until you say,
"I love you too."

Gianna

I'm sorry this had to happen,
But this had to be.
God had a plan for you and I.
It's one you can not see.

I'll be in a better place soon.
Some day I'll see you there.
Never knowing the hard, cold world,
Makes me feel good in here.

Say a prayer for me,
And I'll say one for you.
Even though we weren't together long,
My love for you is true.

Pain

So much wrong,
Not enough good.
I cause my own pain,
To escape the troubles.
I can't face the world alone.
I need you.

All I want to do is love you,
But instead I lost you
And I'm the only one to blame.
My own pain is my lesson.
Only you can take it all away.
I need you.

The hurt I give myself fills my emptiness,
But your love fills it better.
I'll give up the pain for you.
Never let me go,
Or the pain will return.
I need you.

Cold Heart

She cries ice sickles.
I cry tears.
She never needed an ice cube,
Just held the cup to herself.
Her presence freezes the room.
I try to live my life,
Without getting frozen by her.

I'm Sorry

Please forgive me.
I know I've done wrong.
It was a mistake.
I would take it back anyday.

I deserve this h.a.t.e.
Just let me know,
That you forgive me.
And I'll be okay.

I won't speak of your secret.
I'm not a whisperer.
Just your friend.
Waiting for You.